Utterly Fantastic!
My first child was born just over 3 years ago and my
youngest is almost a year old...so by NO means do I claim to be a “seasoned
veteran” at this whole parenting thing.
However, I will say this, sometimes in order to just get myself through
the day, I have to tell myself that I DO know what I am doing (even though
many, many people, books, professionals, websites, etc, etc,) would refute that
statement vehemently. As mamas, we are constantly second guessing ourselves,
especially with our first borns, and I have come to the stark realization that
we need to stop this! There are many way
to completely mess up our children...am I doing some/many/all of them??
Probably every day! I used to peruse mommy blogs and websites, Google different
medical ailments in babies and toddlers in a complete panic, ask family and
friends their opinions on this, that and the other of what the right thing to
do for my babies was and then one day, I stopped. I am not sure when it happened, it just did. Maybe it was in one of my coffee-laden
routines of each and every morning, when I looked at my kids and realized how
happy and healthy they are. Maybe it was
in the nightly routine that my daughter and I have now, when I was rocking her
at 3:30 a.m. and reassuring her I was there for her, feeling her soft skin
against my cheek. Or maybe, just maybe,
it was when I looked in the mirror one day and truly saw the Mama I have
become. A good one. The best one, in my kids’ and husband’s
eyes. Every day, I am seeing her more
and more. And she has some advice for
other mamas who struggle with feeling like they don’t know what on God’s green
Earth they are doing. A Top 10 list if
you will. Here it is:
10. It’s totally okay
that you are addicted to your phone.
Some days it’s our only contact with the outside world and
grown-ups. So go ahead, check Facebook
one more time before lunch.
9. Your child/children will not die just because you leave
them with someone else. Yes, they may
cry and yes it’s hard to leave them and your heart may feel like it’s breaking,
but it’s not. They will be just
fine...and so will you!
8. A friend told me once, “Pick one or two people you really
trust and those are your go-to people for advice and help with raising kids.”
This stuck with me. My go-to’s are my
family doctor and my best friend. They
put up with my crazies!7. You are not evil if you formula feed your baby, put bumpers in the crib and/or give your toddler the Ipad during lunch. You are doing what is best for you and your kids at that time and place. Don’t ever let anyone else’s judgements make you think you are a bad mom. Ever. Professional or not, they are your kids and you know what is best for them and you.
6. I heard this the other day...”Having children is a stressor in a marriage.” Why, yes...yes it is. And a huge “THANK YOU!!” to the person who had the courage to say it out loud. Marriage is hard work and even harder after having kids. Be prepared for this and the complete overhaul your relationship will go through. No one ever talks about this. THIS is what should be taught in a Prenatal class. Am I right on this or what?
5. It’s okay that you
wear yoga pants and t-shirts every dang day.
Confession time...it’s April 3, 2015.
I haven’t worn anything EXCEPT yoga pants since November 28, 2014 at an
early family Christmas celebration.
There. I said it. And it’s not just because I am finishing my
yoga teacher certification, it’s because I LOVE THEM.
4. Tylenol can be your best friend. That is all.
3. Chances are, you
will be a different person once you become a Mama. I did and everything I once knew to be what I
wanted for my life, didn’t exist anymore. It has taken me three years but I am
finally feeling like a better version of the person I used to be. So find your passion and follow your dreams
because your kids will then become dreamers themselves. Wow...wouldn’t that be
amazing?
2. Set your alarm for
one hour before your kids wake, if you can.
Time to yourself is the key to balancing this crazy job called
motherhood. Workout, catch up on emails,
drink hot coffee, do yoga...whatever makes your heart happy. Remember that your soul needs to be fed with
love and nourishment that it can only get from YOU. So please, give yourself this gift and your whole
family will reap the benefits. Oh, and
then nap when your kiddos do in the afternoon, you’re going to need it because
you were up so early!
1. Repeat after me.
“I have enough. I do enough. I am enough.” My best friend sent this to me and it literally
made my jaw drop because I find it so powerful.
When you are doubting yourself and needing reassurance, get it from
YOURSELF by making this your mantra.
Repeat it over and over. Because
it is true, Mamas. You got this and you
are amazing! Start seeing in yourself
the Mama your kids see. She is utterly
fantastic!
